


Spicy Soup

by Celandine_Flower



Category: Horizon: Zero Dawn (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, No Beta, Rating May Change, talking about feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-05
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:34:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23497609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Celandine_Flower/pseuds/Celandine_Flower
Summary: Aloy arrived in Meridian sometime after the events of the game. She was tired, hungry, and didn't have many ideas about what to do next. So she turned to the person who probably wouldn’t let her down, thinking that she may try and ask for help once.
Relationships: Aloy/Erend (Horizon: Zero Dawn)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 55





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I dedicate this thing to the people who politely listened to me fangirling about Horizon: Kaustik and @norsedroids.  
> If you want to help me out and beta this fic, feel free to contact me on twitter @Celandineflower

Meridian seemed as crowded as always. A bit too busy, a bit too shimmering, a bit too nosy for Aloy’s taste. But it was a nice change from weeks and weeks of empty landscapes of the wilds. Forests, mountains, and deserts all looked the same after some point: plane loneliness with rare growlings from the machines, nothing more. The Nora wasn’t used to being around people a lot, but they made her feel safer nonetheless. Big stone walls brightened by the light of day did a good job of creating the illusion of security. She still remembered the time when this city almost got blasted into ruins by numerous deathbringers, but that era was hopefully gone for good. 

Aloy ran around like a hunted rabbit for as long as she could. Helped everyone who asked for her assistance, traveled from one end of the world to another, but everything had an eventual end. Her avoidance needed to finish as well. She couldn’t bring herself back to Rost, that place did not seem like home without him and every breath stunned her right through the chest like a spear. Luckily, Avad was kind enough to offer her Olin’s old house, so she went there when everything else stopped calling. 

Aloy passed by Oseram and Carja workers and craftsmen exchanged several Banuk relics for shards with Cantarah, and faced the inevitable. She had to take some rest for now, in a stranger’s unwelcoming home, where nobody waited for her. The Nora girl would rather face another behemoth than this fate. So she turned to the person who probably wouldn’t let her down, thinking that she may try and ask for help once. 

“Erend,” – Aloy called, approaching a group of Oseram fighters. 

He turned around and a smiled at her in surprise. 

“Aloy! Didn’t think I would see you here, it’s been… quite some time.” – His friends did not rush to leave but thankfully decided to keep some distance this time. 

“Yeah, I didn’t think so myself, but here we are,” – she shrugged her shoulders. – “I needed a place to crash at, and Meridian is always a good one.” 

“Well, I’m glad you came back, I’m always… happy to see you… uh…” – he stumbled upon his words for a second and dropped a fast but sad gaze somewhere to his feet. It wasn’t the first time that Aloy noticed this lost expression on Erend’s face, but now there was no urgent matter that could distract her from it. 

“I actually came to ask you to help me with something.” – Letting his words hang between them for long would be cruel, so the Nora rushed to change the subject. – “I still haven’t settled in Olin’s old house, so perhaps you could help me figure things out? I know it’s not close to the evening yet, but I would really like to rest.” 

“Of course,” – he nodded quickly, - “let me… let me just make sure there’s somebody who can take up my place for now.” 

The Oseram man rushed somewhere beyond his comrades, and Aloy thought that it may be too selfish of her to pull Erend out of his shift. But nobody seemed to be protesting his decision, and she felt a wave of loneliness approaching her, like a river that prepares to overflow during spring. 

“I’m back!” – her friend declared, returning without his heavy armor and the majority of his weapons. – “All ready to go now, what do you need?” 

“Well, I would love a wash,” – she said as they walked away from the rest of the Oseram soldiers, - “and perhaps something hot to eat, but I have almost no idea where to get either of those things.” 

“Well, that’s what I’m here for, isn’t it? I will help you,” – Erend reassuringly nodded and they kept walking. 

Even with all the people scurrying around Meridian, the city was actually quite compact. The road to Olin’s old place hardly took ten minutes. Aloy pushed the wooden door open since no one bothered to lock it up after her last visit. The floor seemed a bit dusty, and the place got a bit gloomy as the sun lowered towards the horizon. The Nora girl took a couple of steps in and stopped, suddenly lacking the will to go any further. 

“Are you okay?” – Erend asked, emerging from behind her back and giving the house a glance. – “Yeah, it doesn’t look very charming, does it?” 

“Looks like another place I don’t belong,” – she sighed and gathered enough strength to take down her bags and weapons. Erend was quiet for a while, evidently taking a sympathetic glance at her and lighting up a couple of lamps inside. 

“Well, at least you can change the place up this time,” – he suggested, taking a critical look at the bed and other furniture. – “But let me check the washroom first, I wonder what Olin had for cleaning up.” 

The wooden door screeched as he opened it, looking inside. Aloy gathered her armor on one of the benches and looked around another time, having nothing to busy herself with. 

“Not as bad!” – Erend called out, stepping into the far room. – “I will get the fire going, and the water should heat up for you pretty soon.” 

The girl heard him assembling the logs and starting flame with his sparker, then came the sound of water filling up one of the Meridian bathroom kettles. Aloy was used to fast dives into cold mountain rivers which kept her semi-clean for the past several months, but she couldn’t remember the last time she actually had a warm bath. People in this city probably had a different way of washing up with all this fancy system that brought water directly to their homes. 

“Can you check the crates in the room to see if there is any new soap or washcloth?” – the Oseram man stepped back in and looked around the shelves and bags. – “I guess Olin left in a rush and did not take time to pack, but we can make it work.” 

Aloy squatted in front of several wooden boxes and opened them up. The insides were mostly filled with clothes that belonged to the former owners, but one of them luckily contained a small casket with perfumes and face paints. 

“I guess this could be helpful,” – she said, picking up flower intricately carved out of soap. It smelled sweet and delicate, nothing like the roots the Nora usually used for themselves. 

“Must be a gift from someone, fancy thing,” – Erend added, sitting down next to her. – “But I guess you deserve it after helping everyone out for this long. See if there’s a washcloth anywhere.” 

“Sometimes I don’t understand how “deserving” even works,” – Aloy sighed quietly and dag through the layers of fabric another time. 

She gathered a piece of someone’s cut-up shirt that could work for one trial just in time for the kettle to boil. Erend excused himself to go and get something for their early dinner so the girl could feel more comfortable changing and bathing in privacy. She quickly picked several clean bedsheets to wrap herself up and headed in. 

The washroom got hot enough to stay in it without clothes. Aloy was happy to get out of the sweated-through pants and shirt, and the calluses all over her were definitely thankful for a little breather. She started off by cleaning her humble garment with the flowery soap and thinking that this was probably a waste of such a fine smell. However, the hot air got pleasantly filled with the sweet scent pretty soon, which she could not bring herself to regret. After several minutes of diligent rubbing and rinsing, the wrung-out clothes hanged on the rope along the side of the washroom, losing small droplets of water onto the wet floor. 

Going further was easy – warm water felt like a blessing, and dirt came down her in layers, relieving and tiring at the same time. As if the washcloth scrapped down her shields and forced strength, leaving the tired Nora girl without her familiar protection. She took one of her decoctions and rubbed it directly into the scars and calluses. Those itched and burned slightly in response. Her hair did not get along with the soap very well, tangling and refusing to take on the foam. Aloy smiled remembering the time when Rost battled with these numerous clots when she was still too small to braid on her own. Now there was no one left to care for her in that way, and the thought of loneliness stung her a little heavier in the loneliness of the empty bathroom. 

When all was done, she put down the flame and wrapped herself in one of the clean bedsheets, ready to face the colder air of the rest of the house. 

“Quite a steam you made there,” – Erend smiled, waving at her from a far corner of the house. He squatted down in front of a small movable burner, cooking something right under the roof. Luckily, a window was open nearby and small blaze flames usually did not produce that much smoke. 

“I thought you went out to buy cooked food,” – the girl replied, shivering slightly after the heat of the washroom. 

“Well, I just thought it would be better to make something hot and special for you,” – the Oseram warrior gestured to the small pot on the flame. – “Must be exhausting to rely on wildfowl for that long.” 

The girl came closer to him with an intrigued look on her face, holding the fabric up so that the bedsheet wouldn’t slip off. The pleasant and slightly spicy smell spread from the simmering soup that Erend mixed with a wooden spoon. Green leaves of some unfamiliar herb were twirling around in the orange liquid, and Aloy could catch a glimpse of some other vegetables. 

“Looks like exactly what I need,” – she said. – “Thank you, Erend.” 

“Oh, it’s nothing,” – he shrugged his shoulders and let out a short nervous laugh. – “Ersa taught me how to make this one, I hope I didn’t mess it up too much.” 

“I’m sure you didn’t,” – the Nora girl smiled softly and reached for the wooden spoon. 

Aloy did not want to pressure her friend too much, but the hunger tugged painfully inside her stomach, and the simmering broth teased her nose mercilessly. She blew on the hot liquid a couple of times and tasted it. Something in the soup was bringing pleasant heat, while earthy herbs brought their pleasant touch to the back of the mouth as well. With a couple of nourishing root vegetables, this dish should have been perfect and not heavy enough to make anyone too full. 

“This tastes amazing, Erend,” – the girl smiled and returned the spoon back into the pot. – “I really like it.” 

“Oh, seriously?” – he looked surprised, happy, and definitely a bit proud of himself. – “Well, I have practiced a couple of times before, so…” 

“I will look for some bowls then?” – Aloy suggested, she was definitely too hungry for small talks, now that she has actually tried the food. 

“Eh… sure,” – the man smiled in understanding and turned to stir the soup once again. – “There should be some in one of the crates.” 

Several wooden dishes and bowls were found pretty soon, all probably suited for carrying on the road. Good enough for a hungry Nora girl and her generous friend as well, so nobody complained. After stopping the fire, they settled in the sleeping area of the house. Aloy climbed onto Olin’s sheets with her feet, because the cold started crippling around the floor as evening invaded Meridian. Erend sat on the floor close to her, steaming bowl in his hand and a half-proud smile on his face. The Nora girl took a glance at her toes covered in firm calluses. They probably needed a bit more potions rubbed into them later, considering how much they helped her in getting along the roads. The darker hair on her legs stood up as chills ran from time to time over her skin. These were to pass soon since the soft bed and heating broth were ready to warm her up. Erend’s kind support made staying in the house a lot more pleasant as well. 

“So,” – he started after a couple of quiet minutes of enjoyment. – “Where did you disappear to this time?” 

“Looked for Banuk Relics all over the place,” – Aloy replied and slurped on another spoon. – “They’re quite nicely hidden, you know.” 

“Crawled around ancient dungeons?” 

“Yeah…” – she stopped for a bit, a piece of carrot steaming halfway to her mouth. – “I want to take a break from them for a while.” 

“Why?” – Erend raised his eyebrows in surprise. – “Isn’t it fun to find out more about the old ones? Lurk through their mysterious glowing stuff? It must be quite valuable to merchants.” 

“It really is,” – the girl agreed. – “But I think I’ve learned enough about the old ones, and, well, the new ones too, I guess.” – She sounded a bit gloomier now, but this didn’t stop her from proceeding with her meal. 

“Is this some sort of sacred secret I should let you keep?” – the Oseram man asked, looking at her frowned expression. 

“No, not really… I guess not many people care enough about this, and those who do are usually some sort of scammers looking for profit.” – The spicy soup now took less than a half of her bowl, but the hunger did not calm down completely. – “Let’s say, some technology in the ruins was used to… create humans, like a mother’s womb would.” 

“Sounds a bit creepy,” – Erend shook his head. – “Does this, well… make you feel unpleasant? Are they still, you know, making people down there?” 

“Not anymore,” – Aloy said, spoon in her hand cornering tasty bits of potato in the round bowl. – “At least not for the past twenty years,” – she grinned briefly, and her companion was all too familiar with that smile. He himself made this expression too often. 

“Hey,” – he bent his back slightly to the side so as to catch the girl’s eyes again. – “What happened then that upsets you so much? Did the machines… mess up something? Made a wrong human?” 

“No, they didn’t, I guess…” – she replied, looking away, at the bedsheets, at the shelves, the cooling burner. – “They made the right human. They made me.” 

Silence filled up the room, confronting the pleasant smell of food and soap. It gloomed heavy, like a rocky cliff that threatens to shower those under it with heavy rocks. And Aloy felt stuck in the sickening moment of waiting for the boulders to crush her. But they didn’t. 

“They made – you? In a machine womb?” – Erend tried to sound as considerate as he could, but perhaps his words were too scratchy on the wound. 

“Yes!” – she said, gaze dropping into the orange broth. – “And so they made me – a program, she made me – the right person, with the right DNA, to do the right thing.” – Her voice sounded irritated and helplessly sad at the same time. – “I just wanted to know where I came from, that’s it! But everything started swirling around, and nobody seems to care that it was so important for me!” – Aloy didn’t raise her voice but the stress in her sentences made her companion frown in concern. – “I came from a piece of steel, left and abandoned from the very beginning. I… I never had a mother…” – She inhaled. – “Everybody acts like it is not a big deal, but this makes me feel so, so lost… I don’t belong anywhere anymore, I have no home, and every ancient cave reminds me of what cold and dead place I came out of.” 

Erend sat in silence. He was surprised and could not deny that. He always knew that the Nora girl in front of him was special, but not in that kind of way. The Oseram man looked at the freckles on her cheekbones, wet hair dripping with water, a half-empty bowl in firm strong hands. Aloy always seemed wonderful to him, but never in the sense of being extraordinarily chosen for a heroic alienated fate. Hardworking, extremely skilled, confident, and ready for a challenge – that is why he was always happy to see her, not because of whatever special missions she had to accomplish. 

“I am… just a copy of a woman from ancient times, made to fulfill a purpose. And even she is nothing more than a dead body now! She was smart, and kind, and caring… but she was so far in the past when I needed her. I never had her, and I was never supposed to have her… I was never supposed to have a mother, to belong. Sometimes I think that I was never supposed to live past the Meridian events, and what do I do with myself now? A useless copy with no purpose on this land.” – The girl’s voice cracked once in a couple of sentences, but she quickly brought it back every time, holding herself together and perhaps pressing her fingers a bit stronger into the wood. 

“You are not a copy, Aloy,” – Erend noted calmly, trying not to cause any more distress. 

“I am made exactly according to her DNA, there are no people more similar than we are!” 

“Well, did this woman from the old times shoot the bow as good as you? Or could she climb a mountain in several minutes barely breaking a sweat? I don’t think so.” – The man noted, not being able to catch his companion’s eyes again. – “And even so, you are not just a weapon good at reaching its target. You are smart. And caring. And even more so – you are kind to every person you meet. It’s hard to find such a human in this world nowadays.” 

“So was she, Elizabet Sobeck. That’s the name of the woman I was made after. Or that was her name.” – The girl stressed the acknowledgment of the past, still losing her sad gaze somewhere in the room. 

“Even so,” – Erend crawled a bit closer to her, balancing the bowl in his left hand, – “I bet she couldn’t ride chargers as good as you do. Perhaps she was a nice person, and you two are very similar, but that does not make you inferior.” – The Nora girl finally met his eyes. – “I bet you have a lot more to yourself than overriding machines and creating a small army of grateful civilians. What do you like, Aloy?” 

“I like…” – she sounded a bit disoriented, taking a second to process his words, – “when turkey skin gets a bit burned from the fire and tastes crispy.” – She was still hungry after all. – “I like your soup.” – The Oseram man smiled and silently asked for her bowl with an open hand. 

The Nora girl gave it to him with a grateful nod and followed him with her sight, thinking for a couple of moments. 

“I bet the old ones did not get to try such tasty things,” – she hummed to herself. 

“Oh, if they knew what they have missed, they would die all over again!” – Erend laughed briefly while filling the bowls back up. Aloy smiled in response, looking at him. 

“I like falling asleep and watching the stars. Sometimes I wonder how much the sky has changed since the old times. I like shooting fish from the shore and then swimming around to pick up the meat. I also think that Carja armor is too firm, it makes me itch if I wear it for several days in a row.” 

“Oh, same thing with me,” – the man replied, taking a sit on the edge of the bed and handing her a portion of fresh and hot soup. – “That is why I would always trade one Oseram arrow-eater for ten Carja swimsuits.” 

“Swimsuits?” – The girl asked, taking a spoonful of vegetables. 

“Well, have you seen them? Nobody should go to the battlefield so underdressed. Have you seen Avad? The guy barely has any shirt on, good thing there is always a regiment and a half to protect him!” 

Aloy briefly laughed, making Erend a bit less worried about her mood. 

“I though Avad’s clothes are more of official gourmets, aren’t they?” 

“Well, yeah, but still! Dervahl comes in, and the king might as well wear a giant target mark on his chest!” – the man gestured with his spoon but soon gave up expressing his confusion. – “I’m not the one to judge anyway, he is a nice person who has done a lot for me and my family.” 

The Nora girl nodded and put another spoonful into her mouth. 

“How have the things been now, since… you started living alone?” – She asked politely, trying not to pressure on the sensitive topic. 

“You mean, since Ersa passed away?” – Erend sighed and looked to the side for a second, addressing the behemoth in the room. – “It is still hard, Aloy. The house is empty and everything feels incomplete if I do not distract myself with hunting and, well, drinking…” – the man paused. - “Alcohol doesn’t help, though,” – he traced a circle with his fingers near his temple. – “Or it just stopped working for me, I guess. The other Oseram guys are sort of kind to me, so that makes everything less stinky. Avad also has a job on his hands at any moment, and the machines are always there to be hunted, disassembled, and sold.” – He did not meet her eyes and sighed again. The crates surprisingly withstood his heavy gaze, but the man decided not to burden them for long. 

“Even so, all of this is still not enough,” – the Nora finished for him and understanding was reflected in her honest expression. – “I guess the sadness always catches up with us, regardless of how fast we can run.” 

“I am starting to think that I will be always a little bit sad and a little bit tired from running,” – Erend commented and a brief ironic smile slid under his mustache. 

“Not if you confront it and maybe you will come out of the fight alive,” – Aloy shrugged her shoulders and let out a short laugh. – “I guess I should face this enemy too.” – She ate another spoonful of the cooling soup. 

“Maybe I am just not ready yet,” – Erend exhaled and looked at his bowl, which lost a solid share of its attractiveness after the conversation. 

“Me neither,” – his companion agreed and caught the man’s regretful expression. – “Perhaps there is no correct time for it, so you don’t have to rush.” 

“You don’t have to rush either,” – the corners of his eyes rose slightly, but not for long. – “I am sure there are a lot of places just waiting to welcome you, Aloy.” – He stood up to take his bowl back to the burner and do something with the small amount of leftover soup. 

“And I am sure there are a lot of ways for you to fill your life again,” – she replied and quickly finished her portion to follow the Oseram man in just several seconds. 

The dishes were washed and the soup was sacred under the lid of the pot in a hope that it will not get spoiled until tomorrow without proper storage. Olin’s family did have a small cellar, but nobody had much enthusiasm to crawl down and explore it. The evening covered Meridian in one smooth motion, like a glinthawk that throws a shadow of its wings over the future prey on the ground. Trade was still going on outside of the small house, but the chatter merged in one undistinguishable flow of noise. Aloy got dried up after the wash, but the chilly wind still tickled her under the not-so-protective bedsheet. She constructed something more covering out of a red duvet cover and one of her older shirts but still preferred to stay on the bed. 

“I see Meridian fashion is getting a new influencer,” – Erend smiled as she exited the washroom. – “Changing two outfits in one evening – you would fit right in with the palace folk.” – There was no mockery in his words, and Aloy shared his genuine irony. 

“Just wait until I introduce combining the Nora beads with the full-on blaze-covered grazer horns,” – she replied, moving her toes to warm the feet up. 

“Are you planning to balance the horns on your head?” – the man asked, still placing the burner back into its place in one of the corners. 

“No way, this is so last-season!” – the woman chuckled shortly. – “Every fashion-monger should attach them to their belt and go around shaking hips so as to hit as many people as possible.” 

“This sounds like a perfect plan to destroy the palace nobility. Good thing Dervahl never thought of that!” – the Oseram warrior smiled and finally managed to secure the device in its respectful position. 

The room went silent for a couple of seconds. There was no tension in it, since both Aloy and Erend felt more comfortable keeping quiet together after the battles and especially this evening. However, it seemed like all was done and their meeting had to come to an end. The Nora has already gotten the long-needed food and bath, so there was probably no more help than her Oseram companion could provide. However, talking with each other seemed like a nice distraction from their respective spiraling lonely thoughts. Neither wanted to be left in solitude, but some sort of hesitation still kept them from being completely open. 

“You must be tired after the road and… everything,” – Erend said managing to hide his disappointment. – “Perhaps I shouldn’t bother you for longer.” – He stood in the middle of the room, a bit awkward, but still not rushing to pick up his armor. 

“You are not bothering me, Erend,” – the Nora girl replied and leaned towards him to close the distance even for a small fraction. – “I am really grateful for everything you did for me today.” 

“Well…” – he let out a flattered laugh, - “I hope the food was alright. But seriously, this does not compare to what you did for me back then.” Aloy shook her head. 

“Don’t think of it as of something you have to pay me back for,” – she said gently, and her companion’s chest felt a bit tight because of the tone of her voice. – “I am always happy to help you.” 

“I, uh… well…” – he struggled to pick the right words. Was he supposed to thank her another time? Or reply with the same promise to always help her as well? But can he really do anything that would be of use to a woman like her? Her skills, intelligence, and the kind of struggles she faced – he has only seen a fraction of those, and that alone was still enough to leave him in eternal amazement. The pause stretched for too long and started sending spikes of panic in Erend’s head. This was supposed to be a smooth goodbye, but now he was threatening to ruin everything, and… 

“Erend?” – his companion called from the distanced reality. – “Do you think you can stay the night today?”


	2. Chapter 2

“Erend? Do you think you can stay the night today?” – the question broke the silence in the room but did not provoke an immediate answer.

The Oseram man froze for a second, not quite believing his own ears and questioning the reality. Perhaps his embarrassment has just killed him and now the blissful afterlife played cruel tricks with his wishes. However, the floor felt pretty solid under the feet and the chilly wind still slithered across the room from the partially opened window behind his back. Perhaps these signs were enough to believe that Erend did not just hallucinate this invitation from the person he craved to spend more time with.

“Eh… yeah, sure,” – he managed to say and awkwardly exhaled, still standing as if he suddenly had nowhere to put himself.

She smiled at him from the bed and sat up more comfortably, her legs wrapped in the duvet cover and damp hair still making her shoulders wet. Aloy patted the mattress next to her and the sincere look in her eyes made Erend’s hesitation step back a bit. He joined the Nora, taking a seat right next to her. The room around them looked… alien. Olin’s old belongings stayed on the shelves and in the crates, the smell of the spices started slowly drifting off through the window. Another place they didn’t belong, indeed.

“I thought you returned to the Nora lands after everything calmed down,” – the Oseram broke the silence. – “Sort of assumed you and that… uh… the handsome guy from your tribe would find something to do together.”

The girl turned to him in surprise and giggled.

“You mean Varl?” – she asked, laughter still echoing in her voice.

“Yeah, I guess… The one who helped us protect Meridian.” – Erend shrugged his shoulders, feeling a bit embarrassed.

“Yes, that’s him, huh,” – Aloy confirmed. – “I guess you find him handsome then, that’s in-…”

“Well, not in that sense!” – her companion protested.

“Not in what sense, Erend?” – she chortled.

“I mean, objectively, he is indeed a… well-fit young man with… eh… attractive features? I mean… no! uh…” – he stumbled upon his own words again and looked at the girl in indignation, the tips of his ears slightly pink.

“That’s alright, don’t get all worked up about it,” – the Nora pat his shoulder slightly. – “Varl is actually handsome, I agree.”

“Aloy!”

“Alright-alright,” – she smiled and sat back, eyes wondering around the room. – “Honestly, I don’t know if I want to go back to the Sacred Land. Maybe not yet.” – A sigh escaped her lips. – “The Nora are… quite protective over their views and traditions. After I had to get into the ruin inside the All-Mother Mountain, they started viewing me as… some sort of a spiritual figure, I guess. Some of them still call me ‘anointed,’ and it drives me insane.” – The girl’s sight got lost somewhere in the air of the house, unfocused, thoughtful. – “They cast me out and avoided my entire life. Then, when I was finally accepted after the proving, I had to become a seeker and run away to fight machines, cults, and bandits.” – A short pause followed her frowning eyebrows. – “And even after that, when I returned to help them, they decided it was easier to worship me than do anything else.” – Indignant eyes suddenly looked around, as if seeking answers, but none were there. So she turned to her companion. – “They distance themselves every time. How am I supposed to be the Aloy of Nora, if the Nora get further and further away from me?”

“You are not supposed to be anything, Aloy,” – he answered, looking at her upset face. – “You have helped every tribe around here, perhaps every tribe in the world. That is something all people are grateful for, but none of that would be done without your decisions.” – He tried catching a hint of effect from his words, but so far it seemed that the wall of despair was only slightly cracked. – “Your courage, your kindness, everything – it would not matter who you were supposed to be if you did not decide to become who you’ve become.” – He said, focusing on the slightly relaxing features of her face. - “And, honestly, I don’t care about destiny and other scraps, nobody should care. What matters is what you have actually done and what you are willing to do from now on. No plan, no route, none of that. The world is upon your palm, especially for a person like you,” – Erend smiled softly, and she mirrored that smile for a brief moment. – “You don’t have to belong with the Nora if you don’t want to. Any tribe, any lodge, any group would be happy to have you, Aloy. But most importantly, I think you belong to the world.” – He paused, thinking for a second. – “Oof, I hope I didn’t sound too dramatic there.”

“That’s okay,” – his companion replied. – “I get what you mean.” – She laid down on her back, looking at the ceiling. – “Perhaps I am not ready to let go of Nora just yet, but thank you, Erend. You are very kind to me.”

The man was grateful that Aloy did not see his embarrassed smile. His cheeks felt hotter for a moment, but the Oseram was able to brush it off, winning a bit of time by positioning himself next to the girl.

“So, anyway… what’s with Varl?” – perhaps bringing up another guy could ensure him that there was nothing for him to be flustered about.

“Well, Varl is… with the Nora majority on this matter,” – she replied. – “Still wants to call me exalting names and definitely prefers to stay within the Sacred Land.” – A smile appeared on her lips for a second. – “If you want to enjoy his beauty, you would have to stay within the Mother’s Embrace.”

“Well, I wouldn’t trade exploring the world for one – though objectively handsome – guy,” – Erend replied with a bit of irony.

“Yeah, that is exactly what I mean,” – the Nora girl sighed.

Another stretch of silence slithered in with the evening wind, but this time it felt more natural. Both of them had their thoughts to process: Aloy’s mind circled around the place she grew up in, while her companion could not drive his focus away from the frozen-still reality. Staying over with the huntress he admired most of all, sharing a meal and perhaps even falling asleep while talking – all of that excited him beyond measure, but also brought a tiny stinging sorrow. The girl appeared trusting and very open to the Oseram, shared her concerns and deep thoughts. This arrangement could not be broken with any of his stupid hopes. Erend was sure that she could physically snap him in half with little effort, but he would still prefer that to betraying her sincerity with a foolish attempt to show his feelings. Perhaps the Nora has noticed them a long time ago, and now it was up to him to respect her decision of setting the unnecessary emotions aside.

“Even without Varl,” – the man said, trying to push the topic of their conversation as far away from himself as possible, - “I’m sure there are many people who would be happy to support your explorations and adventures.”

“Such as who?” – Aloy asked, looking at her companion from the corner of her eyes.

“Oh, I don’t know…” – the fighter stumbled, starting to regret his word choice. – “But I’ve seen the way Avad looks at you and there is this woman, Vanasha, she appeared in the council recently…”

“Well, let’s assume me and the Sun-King will not get along based on our fashion preferences,” – she said, lifting herself up on one elbow. – “But what makes you think Vanasha is interested? She must be busy with political intrigues nowadays.”

“She is, but…” – Erend took a pause to put his thoughts together. – “When she arrived, we talked a lot about you and everything you did for Meridian, so… During the council meetings, Vanasha often called you a huntress.”

“Yes?” – the girl raised her eyebrows. – “That cannot be it if you think she considers me as someone special.”

“Well, she… called you a ‘little huntress,’” – the warrior looked away but the feeling of Aloy’s intrigued gaze did not leave him. – “’A pretty little huntress,’” – he confessed with a tired exhale.

“Wow, that is definitely a serious compliment,” – the Nora girl smiled sarcastically. – “Do you think I should approach her for marriage now?”

“That’s not what I meant!” – the man protested, looking at her and meeting the coy brown eyes. – “It’s just that… she surely likes you, but it seems as if… she doesn’t respect you enough.” – His companion’s eyebrows rose up a bit. – “No- not that I am the one to judge of course!” – he tried to back away, but it was too late.

“No-no-no,” – Aloy chucked shortly, turning onto her stomach and thus getting closer to the man. – “Now you have to tell me, what would a suitable partner be like, Erend. Come on.”

Her arm was slightly touching his elbow, now that they lied next to each other. Her brown eyes reflected the warm light of the burning lamps and the drying hair messily framed her smiling face. This near, the fighter could smell the scent of the fancy soap they found earlier, and each individual freckle on her cheekbones could be easily counted, like tiny spring flowers in a field of grass. The man sighed as quietly as he could so as not to let out any of his annoying thoughts.

“I-… I don’t think I am the right person to give you advice,” – he tried to back away, but it was too late.

“No-no-no, you have to tell me now. If you think Vanasha is not respectful enough, you must have opinions on other characteristics.” – the Nora girl teased, leaning a bit towards her companion.

“I really shouldn’t…” – the man tried protesting one last time, but this attempt was cut off with one precise strike like machine wires are slashed with a spear.

“But you do. So tell me, Erend, how do you choose partners for yourself?” – a noticeable tone of curiosity appeared in her words, and this interest suddenly flared up the fighter’s face with pink.

“I… uh…” – he tried to collect himself back into his hands, but it was quite a challenge under the huntress’ smiling eyes. He took a breath, sighed quietly, and looked up at the ceiling, trying to find something to focus on. – “I guess, I just… value honesty and, perhaps, support. It’s not like I need someone to constantly wait for me, I wouldn’t stop anyone from exploring the world, but… It would be nice to travel and fight together, you know?”

“Uh-huh,” – Aloy nodded, her expression getting warmer.

“And I also like strong people,” – he chuckled, - “if I see someone who can lift a strider, it’s over for me.”

The girl giggled shortly, propping her face on her hand. Messy ginger hair fell to the right, losing several small droplets of water onto the bed surface. Erend looked at her and involuntarily drew a sip of air in, opening his lips slightly. The huntress could see the smile ghosting off his face and finally caught a shadow of the deeply-hidden sadness.

“Honestly, I just keep falling for people I admire. Somebody completely out of my reach, unbelievably skilled and accomplished,” – he sighed, looking away from the girl’s face. – “It has to be something wrong with my silly head, if I keep aiming for the targets my arrows would never even fall near.” – The man grinned briefly, brushing off this momentary disclosure.

Aloy looked at his face, softly lit by the burning-out lamp, and felt as if he was suddenly leaving their little sleepover. Of course, Erend stayed on the bed, but his words almost pushed them apart, pressured him to turn from her face, laugh their discussion off, and not in a good way. He did not seem to mean anything offensive or to show any disinterest. Perhaps she just touched upon the wrong subject, bringing up something hurtful.

“I don’t see how you yourself are not an accomplished and skilled fighter,” – the girl said compassionately and softly covered his upper arm with her hand. – “You’re not exactly the shooting type, but one of the best battle partners nonetheless.”

“I… guess I’m better at being a battle buddy than someone to go on dates with,” – he smiled, making an effort to push the corners of his lips up. – “But that’s okay, nothing to complain about.”

“No-o!” – Aloy protested, not sure whether she was disagreeing with her companion’s words or with his attempt at closing up further. – “Well, perhaps you should start looking for a date yourself? It could be a nice way to change things up and find someone who can make you happy.” – Her grip got firmer for a short second, but she made an effort not to put pressure on the fighter.

He kept looking away and did not move a muscle on his body, as if stung by a freeze arrow. The smiles he was trying to pull together splattered away in shreds, echoing in the features of his round face.

“I don’t think I can do this right now,” – he sighed, shaking his head slightly. – “I can’t really… focus on looking for someone. I- it’s all too wired up, I’m sorry for bringing this up, Aloy.” – The man tried to brush the topic off again and looked at the girl, lifting one arm as if he was going to turn onto his side.

“No,” – she responded firmly. – “Don’t try and hide from me, I’ve just told you about how my own tribe tries to exclude me in several different ways.” – The huntress sighed, calming herself down, and softly caressed his upper arm in an attempt to comfort, as if he was a small anxious animal. – “I would really want to hear you out. I can see that something is tormenting you, and… I am worried. I want to help.”

A spike of panic pierced Erend through his backbone, whipping his heart to start racing even faster. He dug out a hole in mud for himself, and now there was no way other than to jump into it. The man was terrified of pushing the huntress away and losing her trust, but he was also helpless in the face of the disclosure and its catastrophic consequences. Both routes led him farther from her and now it was too late to turn back. At least he had that evening, and it should have been more than enough to remember and be grateful.

“I… uh…” – the man licked his lips, suddenly realizing that his mouth went dry. – “I just… I’ve already found someone I would want to be… with.” – The last word sounded quiet and low, but he pushed through the sadness nonetheless. – “But it didn’t work out, so… It’s still a little bit sore.”

“Oh, I am sorry to hear that,” – Aloy responded, as quiet as him but with a lot more warmth and compassion.

The room went dim, evening sun long gone over the horizon. Meridian has switched to its nighttime activities, voices, and music echoing somewhere on the streets. The lamp started losing its flame, running out of fuel and making the shadows longer. The warmth from the burner and steam has worn out, chilly winds slithering across the floor like rats inside a cavern. However, they both felt somehow hidden and separated from any flouncing thing or being. There was a separate place for the two of them, laid close together, looking, sharing, longing. A sacred connection, living off its short but precious term.

“Do you… want to tell me who is it that you like?” – Aloy’s face was so close at the moment, he could sense the smells of spices in her breath, the wetness of her hair brushing against his light shirt.

Erend felt like he has lost a thousand opportunities during this evening alone, and he was so unspeakably tired. Tired of his grief, tired of his desperate loneliness, tired of his silly emotions, and, more than ever, tired of trying to hide everything. If there was no way out of ruining this link he held so dearly, he might as well finish it while he could. The words did not come easily, but those could be the last he hoped to ever say while being this close to the huntress.

“It’s you,” – he whispered. – “I love you, Aloy.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings:  
> this chapter is where it gets PG  
> also, consent is withdrawn in this chapter and the intercourse stops, but everyone and everything stays alright

“It’s you. I love you, Aloy.”

Erend’s words disappeared in the air like they were never spoken. However, they have irrevocably left his lips and sunk into the silence between him and the huntress. The Oseram man waited, scared of making any new sounds that could worsen the situation. He savored last moments left before going astray and never quite turning back to how things were. Seconds ticked away in synch with his pulse, lying low as if he could hide off from what was coming.

“You… love me?” – the Nora girl asked quietly, her brown eyes still scanning his face in surprise.

“Yes,” – Erend’s voice went dry and hoarse, making him borrow another moment to gain the sound back. – “I’m sorry it all turned out this way, Aloy. I think it will be better off if I let you rest now,” – another smile pulled his face together as he slowly lifted himself off the bed.

There was a definite struggle between his desperate wish to stay and the rational thought of leaving. Any silly attempts to pressure this conversation further would seem like screaming at a snuffed-out candle to light it back up. Like another occasion in the Oseram man’s life, it has flown by, screeching through him with glinthawk claws. Never worthy enough to grapple, and always with sufficient bare flesh to hurt. His body went a bit numb, trying to contain the sorrow, but suddenly this wasn’t the only obstacle to his movement. It felt like his sadness finally got heavier than the usual metal armor and tried to sink him down. So the fighter needed a quick second to collect the strength and get up.

“Erend, stay,” – the firm voice brought him back to reality.

The girl held a strong grip on his forearm, almost pinning it to the bed. It was her hand keeping him from moving, but the foggy thoughts didn’t let him recognize it at first. She frowned, sitting up and looking at the man with strict concern in her clear eyes. Perhaps he has made her angry after all and, at that moment, he would accept any kind of consequences.

“You are not going anywhere like this,” – she said and reached her other arm towards him.

Aloy’s palm was soft, fingers strong, used to shooting arrows and handling spear. She reached for his shoulder first, and then, suddenly, up his neck to cup his cheek.

“You’re all pale, look at me,” – he did, feeling lost in every tiny movement. – “I’m sorry I pushed you to confess before you were ready.”

“I would never-” – he whispered, sensing the hair of his beard touch the huntress’ hand.

“Well, that’s too bad, because you are wonderful,” – the Nora girl interrupted, not waiting for him to finish the sentence. – “And I would hate to miss showing that I like you too,” – she sat up on her knees, getting closer to her companion.

Aloy’s hand softly guided Erend’s head forward almost without his awareness. The smell of soap hit him, clear but clouding his stingy thoughts even further, and he could only draw a small sip of air in before she pressed their lips together.

The kiss was filled with the warmth of spices, soft and stunning at the same time. The man was too hesitant to move, freezing his eyes shut and only responding after several heartbeats went by. When the huntress finally felt him move, she released her grip to touch his shoulder. They didn’t stay connected for long, emotions too bare to silence.

“Stay,” – the girl asked again, slightly pulling Erend towards herself, - “please.”

He wanted to respond, but all the thoughts kept scattering away, leaving nothing to puzzle words from. The fighter leaned forward, following the huntress’ guidance. Even now something made him feel lost, a sense of uncertainty and disbelief crawling inside like a rockbreaker under the soil. As he put his palm on the mattress, the bed squeaked softly bringing him back into the fragile reality.

“Oh, Aloy…” – he managed to exhale, getting down on the right side of the huntress and landing right into her embrace.

“Yes, I’m right here,” – she whispered in response. – “I got you, Erend, come closer.”

The Oseram man’s arm gave out several fleeting shakes as he wrapped it around the girl’s waist and placed his wide hand between her shoulder blades. They got tangled in each other’s hold and stayed still, faces close together. The huntress could easily reach the man’s ear, bending her arm right behind his head. She traced along the tiny hairs and gently caressed the soft spot near his piercing. The fighter drew in a shattered breath, disoriented between the soft eyes, the countless freckles, and thin gentle lips.

“I… uh…” – he looked her face over once again, stopping to meet her gaze, and sighed. – “I never thought you would… you know… see someone like me this way.”

A smile softened Aloy’s features as she witnessed Erend gradually coming back into his senses.

“Well, why wouldn’t I? You are kind, brave, and so caring,” – she moved her left hand up his body and placed it right above his facial hair again. – “Not to mention handsome and really, really charming.”

“S-stop!” – the man chuckled, the pale skin on his face quickly gaining color. He hid his gaze and tried turning away only to press deeper into the huntress soft palm.

“If only to kiss you another time,” – she said, moving close enough to press their chests together. – “May I?”

Aloy waited, inches from his face, still warm from the bath and gentler than anyone has ever been. The fighter did share his bed with others before, but neither men nor women ever stayed beyond several passionate meetings. It was always heated like a fine furnace, rushed to start, and even more hastened to finish.

“Yeah,” – Erend answered quietly. – “Of course you may.”

“Thank you,” – his companion answered almost soundlessly, the words revealed only through the movement of her lips.

They connected again, the huntress guiding the Oseram man to lie on his back. She placed her hand right next to his head, hanging over and carefully slithering her tongue over his closed mouth. Her partner couldn’t reach up to hug her around the long neck, but he softly held her waist, strong and solid with muscles. He breathed in slightly and parted his lips to be overtaken with sensations. Aloy’s wet hair tickled his cheek, her arm lied securely right under his neck as she used it for support. They kissed deeper and more loving with every second. The girl didn’t rush in, taking time to caress his tongue and sensing every waive of pleasant chills.

They broke apart for a second, both catching air back into their chests. The huntress lifted herself up to move the drying red hair further from her partner’s face. The two met their gazes, both slightly blushing and out of breath, only to smile and reach for each other again.

“More,” – Erend exhaled, holding the Nora girl right above her knee, where she tried to wrap around him second ago.

“Yes,” – she nodded, rolling back onto the sheets, hands confidently holding his shoulders.

They kissed again, almost mirroring their previous embrace, pressing close and holding strong. Aloy parted her knees so as to fit the man’s leg between them, her improvised skirt pulling up and revealing the pale skin covered in darker hairs. The sense of his warm hands and soft flesh made her smile with pleasure.

However, this quick pause was enough for the fighter’s concerns to get back to him. Everything seemed to be swirling too fast, the kisses and the treasured embraces rushing one after the other. Erend could be a passionate lover and he knew a thing or two on how to please his partners, but he couldn’t treat Aloy as an occasional bed companion. They felt so connected while talking and he would rather face a thunderjaw alone than lose that bond.

“You okay?” – the girl asked as she pulled back after losing the sense of his response. – “Erend?”

He remained silent for several heartbeats, lost between his worry and sudden guilt from breaking what his partner must have wanted.

“Yes,” – he answered without thinking and immediately looked down, correcting himself. – “No.”

The Nora girl reached for his face again, the second hand holding his shoulder and almost keeping it from crumbling down in doubt.

“Tell me,” – she asked softly, - “whatever you need, I want to help you.”

The fighter looked back at her, once again guided by her caring palm. It felt so easy to lean into her holding, so safe to be in her attention, so warm to feel her kindness. Erend tilted his head to the side, gently pressing the soft cheek into the huntress’ embrace.

“Nothing bad is going to happen,” – the girl said confidently and calmly, - “I promise.”

The Oseram man chuckled in response, intending no mockery. His features went soft and he sighed, leaning further to be held and caressed.

“I… I just need to know, Aloy,” – the fighter said, tone a bit hoarse and doubting, - “is… is this going to last?”

“You mean, you and me?” – she asked, holding him close and brushing her fingers over the side of his head again.

“Yeah…” – the fighter sighed quietly, fear crawling out of the darker parts of his consciousness once more.

The huntress could feel every second stretching long enough to harm her partner. So she softly pressed him closer, only taking a short moment to pick out the right words.

“I would love this to last, Erend,” – she responded, caressing his temple and ear. – “It would be wonderful to be with someone like you. We don’t have to do anything you don’t want, okay?” – the girl reminded, gently running her other hand over the length of his wide arm.

“Okay…” – the man echoed, breathing in and out to think over the words he just heard. – “Do you… do you really mean that?” – He lifted himself up on his arms to look at the huntress’s face and confirm that he did not imagine her words into existence.

“Of course,” – the girl smiled warmly and brushed her hand over his beard again. – “Now, your eyes look so tired, you must want to rest.”

The fighter’s face did show definite signs of weariness. And even if there were relief and gratefulness in his features, they felt heavy enough to drag him onto a pillow. The Nora girl looked similar. Steamy bath and nourishing soup have relaxed her enough to feel drowsy, to begin with, and when the tension between her and Erend got resolved, she could really use some sleep. Of course, both of them could pull through a heated exchange of kisses and breaths, but when momentary passion stepped aside, they started valuing each other’s comfort more.

“I- I wouldn’t want to… you know… let you down,” – the Oseram man answered, searching for any sign of disappointment on his partner’s face.

“You are not letting me down in any way,” – Aloy answered kindly and changed her position on the bed to rest on the pillows. – “Besides, I am pretty exhausted too.”

Erend followed her welcoming gesture and laid back down, wrapping his arm over her. They managed to get comfortable, hugging each other, and exchanging small occasional kisses.

The huntress got a perfect position to press her lips against the man’s head as he partially rested on her chest and shoulder.

“Uh, Aloy?” – the fighter called several minutes after the room went quiet.

“Yeah?” – the girl answered sleepily, caressing his hair almost without thinking.

“Wake me up if I start snoring, okay?” – the Oseram man asked, slight embarrassment noticeable in his voice.

“Okay,” – the huntress chuckled, hugging him closer and pressing a soft kiss to his temple. – “I will help you get more comfortable if that happens, don’t worry.”

Erend hummed in response, finally closing his eyes after a long evening. Meridian has gotten quiet outside, more and more people returning to their houses. The lamps of the room have almost run out of fuel, the darkness of the night flowing in through the windows for quite some time. When one arrogant chilly wind got the companions cold, they hid under one wide blanket, not willing to separate for long. The Oseram fighter took long deep breaths drifting off to sleep and Aloy mirrored them quickly calming down. They stayed close together, feeling each other’s chests rising and falling. The house and the city they didn’t belong in stepped aside, allowing them to finally belong with each other.

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to discuss and share your opinion either here or on twitter @Celandineflower


End file.
